understandablydumb:

the guy on the radio just said “gas prices aren’t so bad if you consider you’re really buying liquid explosive dinosaurs” and my perspective on life is forever changed

I wonder what it’s like to have someone fall for you. And I mean really fall for you. Not just they want to get in your pants because they think you’re attractive. But be consumed with every little piece of you. The way you talk, the way you laugh, the way you just exist. To everyone in love: you don’t know how lucky you are.

:|

megaman2:

megaman2:

“mickey mouse it says you want to divorce minnie because she was…… extremely silly?”

“no, i said she was fucking goofy”

please stop reblogging this i stole this joke from my brother

animetimsutton:

vaspim:

If you think your life sucks, just look at this picture and think “it could be worse.”

palms are sweaty
knees weak, arms are heavy
it’s fallen out of my hands already
mom’s spaghetti

shoe-inhibitions:

When he cums in your hand, wipe it on his forehead and whisper: “Simba”

ohmyloki:

flying-inca56:

“Tony no” a biography by Pepper Potts

areyoutryingtodeduceme:

this will never not be hilarious to me